Uncensored (They Suck So Bad) Pt.1

Minimalisitc and unapologetic reviews of fragrances we all should carefully avoid. Just in case you come in contact with any of the following compositions, be sure to have one of these:

Lorenzo Villoresi Dilmun

I very rarely use certain types of words in my reviews but when I smelled Dilmun for the first time on my skin I immediately thought: "Oh God if it sucks!



It sucks, there's nothing to do. Neroli, orange blossoms and other heavy white flowers on a messy vanilla base with green undertones on top. MEH One of the worst Villoresi I've ever experienced.



Rating: 3/10

Nina Ricci Memoire D'Homme

After outstanding releases such as Phileas, 1975 Fifi award winning Farouche, Nina and a bunch of others, Memoire D'Homme stands in the house range as one of the most disappointing. Please, leave me "c-alone".


Rating: 3/10

Memo Moon Safari

Alert! Alert! Alert! Designer in disguise...Alert!



Moon Safari was suggested to me as a vetiver prominent composition but all I got is a citrusy EDC type of stuff with an overall generic vibe. Dries down to a sweeter tonka base with a faint vetiver note...Disappointing.



Rating: 3/10

Molinard Ecoute Moi

A soapy citrus/floral of absolutely no interest. Money burned.



Rating: 3/10

Wahsintgon Tremlett Hampstead Water

An highly unpleasant combo of lavander, bergamot and sort of candied orange laying on a musky base (where's leather?). Aimed to revisit the classic cologne but with a bad result. if you want to smell like desinfectant, go ahead.



Rating: 3/10

Demeter Fragrance Rain

An interpretation of the rain that you can easily find in one of those scratch and sniff books for 3-4 years old children. Puerile.



Rating: 3/10

Penhaligon's Bluebell

Sometimes I forget how much a perfume can be ugly and annoying. Anytime it happens I smell Bluebell as a reminder. Horrifying synthetic floral at its worst. Simply abominable.

Rating: 2/10

Davidoff Champion

A perfect fragrance if you do your workout routines with plastic dumbells! Cheap!

Rating: 2/10

Cartier Cartier De Lune

OMG, I can't believe this is the new feminine parfum by Cartier as it's so ridiculous. I'm trying to immagine the company meeting where they discussed the product. The big boss standing at the round table stating: "This perfume is amazing, we approve it, let's start the production". Are you guys serious????? Do they really think we'll like it? Do they really think we're dump enough to simply appreciate it because it's by Cartier?That's quite offensive from you guys at Carter! This is completely undistinguishable from other billions and billions of cheap department store feminine parfumes of the past 30 years. Absolutely ridiculous and generic. If someone gives you a sampler, stay away from it. A very silly fragrance!

Rating: 2/10


...to be continued...